How to unwind from things that keep you stuck

Unwinding 101

In case you didn’t know, #boldthinkers, it is halftime.

Half of 2015 has come and gone which means it’s time to make sure you are exercising your bold right to:

  • go after the things that excited you

  • put yourself on your top priority list

  • eliminate ongoing frustrations

  • live on your own terms

  • unwind from ingrained messages or behaviors that keep you small

  • apply your bold mindset

Last week, a group of #boldthinkers and I gathered for a Bold Pep Talk Meet Up. The topic of this gathering was Unwinding 101.


Some of the participants said they were drawn to the event because they knew they needed more rest and relaxation in their lives. They were overdoing in certain areas which drained them from focusing on things that actually added value to their lives. Wishes were being put in timeout instead of being transformed into an action plan. Self-doubt was crowding out the growth of feeding into what we all know we are capable of. Unnecessary mumble jumble of daily living was getting in the way of taking first steps. Excuses were plentiful which kept many of the participants wound up.



I explained the key steps to unwinding so you can boost your self-confidence, temper the fear of failure, turn wishes into plans, and enjoy the journey that creates your bold life are:

  • relax and release things or thoughts that cause tension

  • disentangle from rigid behaviors that keep you stuck

  • let go of habits that underserve you

  • untwist from needing approval from others



Unwinding may sound big, over-the-top, and almost impossible, but it is easier than you think. Unwinding is not a wham bam process.


Unwinding is ongoing, gentle, focused, and worth any and all effort.


To get started, give yourself a minimum of 15 minutes, and a comfortable space to work through Unwinding 101 prompts:

I want to unwind from…

(e.g. thinking I have to have everything figured out, being unhappy with my body, my toxic relationship with XX, overscheduling my family, believing I’m not enough)

I know I am capable of ____, but ____ gets in the way…

(e.g. I know I am capable of going to the gym every day, but binge watching Netflix late at night gets in the way.)

When I am 100% honest with myself, I know I have to stop…

(e.g. When I am 100% honest with myself, I know I have to stop worrying about what my mother will think.)

To start UNWINDING, my first step…

(e.g. To start UNWINDING, my first step will be to get more sleep, starting tonight.)

3 months from now, I want to boldly be able to say…

(e.g. 3 months from now, I want to boldly be able to say that I am stronger and have more energy because I am taking better care of myself.)


The Bold Pep Talk participants used the Unwinding 101 prompts to openly discuss, dissect, reframe, and disentangle from one area/habit that was causing tension in their lives. The immediate feedback I received was:

  • I need to do a better job of listening to myself.

  • I am more than capable of doing what I need to do on a daily basis. I need to give myself more credit.

  • I am in charge of myself and I don’t know why I keep forgetting.

  • I’m adding these Unwinding prompts to my morning warm up.

  • I love when women get together. I feel like I can make anything happen now. I’m unwinding from thinking that evenings out with other women are frivolous.

  • I made a resolution to stop being a people pleaser. What I really need to do is unwind from people pleasing – like delete that, today.

  • Unwinding sounds so simple but it’s so powerful which means I’m powerful.

  • I’m too tangled up in my sisters’ business. I need to unwind from that so I can love them unconditionally and not be exhausted when I think about being with them.

  • I must unwind from thinking I am a bad mother. I judge myself too harshly. I work hard at it daily and that is what a good mother does.


What is causing you tension right now in your life? How can you unwind from it?

The next Bold Pep Talk Meet up will be in August 2015.


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