I gave up on the idea of work-life balance years ago.
My oldest was in elementary school.
[She's in her second year of college right now.]
My husband and I were both working full-time in positions that came with a lot of responsibility.
I was in a big leadership role and feeling so much pressure.
I was navigating the “boys club” and the “tax” of WWB (working while Black) in an institution that was not diverse.
It was all overwhelming and completely consuming.
I felt heavy pressure and stressed out all the time.
But, I was still trying to navigate it all like an expert - with ease, grace, energy, and finesse.
It was not working.
One morning, in the rush of everything, I asked my husband, “How do you handle parenting guilt and all the spinning plates of adult-life while you are working?”
He looked at me and blinked a bunch of times.
His response, “Honey, when I’m at work, I’m just at work. That’s all I’m doing. That’s all I’m focused on - otherwise I would feel crazy all the time.”
Uhm...I was feeling crazy all the time.
So, that was the day a mental shift happened for me.
That was the day when I decided to partake in a bolder diet of living.
That was the day when I left myself off the hook of doing things like everyone else around me.
I stopped worrying.
I stopped worrying about work-life balance.
My mindset shifted to work-life harmony.
Work-life harmony, for me, meant:
- I could let go of the guilt of being at work.
- I could stop working when I was at home.
- I could ask my husband for more help with our daughter and family life.
- I could drop some balls and life would still be OK.
- I could stop listening to the other parents at my daughter’s school - who always offered unsolicited advice based on their personal values and social status.
- I could take breaks, breathe, and just sit down when I wanted to get off the hamster wheel of busy living.
- I could see my daily life from a bold lens - instead of a lens of not having it all together.
This shift didn’t happen overnight, but it took about a year of unprogramming and reprogramming.
It was a year of going on the Bold Living Diet.
It's the best diet I've ever been on.
So this week, think about what would provide the best work-life harmony for you.
Come up with a short list of things you would like to shift.
Make note of what tools or resources that could support you.
Highlight how this shift will make you feel happier, healthier, and more bold.
You deserve it, so start today.