How do you make decisions?
Do you think about ease, outcome, your reputation, appearing smart, how it will impact others, or how it will position you?
Or do you think about long-term effects, survival, leaving a legacy, fear of failure, or past patterns?
If you asked me these questions – I would say a lot of my decision making – before I was 35 years old, was based on comfort and sustainability.
I wanted to always make the best decisions.
I was overly concerned with making perfect decisions so life would be easy, safe, moving in the appropriate direction (whatever that means), and minimized any type of stress.
Yes, I know.
That was not having a bold mindset.
That type of thinking and decision making didn’t really work.
Because that’s not life, that’s not living fully, and that’s not true decision making.
As I became older, got more comfortable with discomfort, started caring less about how people judged me, and got over worrying about my SFDs (shitty first drafts) – my decision making process became less of an internal struggle.
True decision making (vs best decision making) allows you to use your vulnerability, moments of shame, and curiosity as guides that are honest and protective.
True decision making allows you to be freer, breathe deeper, and become bolder – even while you are struggling and figuring things out.
True decision making is about opening up, letting curiosity guide you, setting yourself up to learn from any failures, and using regret a data point (vs. being the final determiner of your worth).
When I’m making true decisions – instead of best decisions – here are some of the questions I ask myself:
- Why do you want this?
- How will you make time in your schedule for this?
- Will it adversely affect your wellness goals?
- Why do you think you need to know more/do more in order to try this/go for this?
- What thoughts of past failures are bubbling up right now? Why?
- Are you trying to compete with someone else or prove yourself?
What is your decision making process?
Do you focus on making the best decision or truest decision?
Is your decision making process holding you back or keeping you stuck?
Checkout the “26 True Decision Making - Questions” list.